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Working in a pandemic is difficult for many. I hear people talking about the days when we didn’t have to see each other from behind the screens. However, for me, it was the norm. My professional journey started in the middle of a pandemic and the virtual world became my reality. The virtual reality of COVID-19 was also the norm until the day I lost my father.

Losing a parent in the mid-20s comes with a lot of guilt, fear, unsettlement and distraction from life goals. When all of this happened, my whole team was far away on a mental wellbeing retreat in the foothills of Himachal Pradesh. However, as soon as they received the news, there was instant support that followed.

“Happy are the moments, not the whole life,” said Gayatri Buragohain, the executive director of FAT in one of my individual meetings with her. Although she is the founder of an organisation; making her super busy on most days, she has always been one of the go-to people at FAT for me. This line came with a realisation that life goes on no matter what. It gave me relief from the regrets I was holding on to because I could not do certain things for Papa before he left. One of the many gestures that touched me was that Gayatri also gifted me a book of essays by Jenny Diski about death, life and the joys of solitude.

When I joined FAT back in November 2020, I was full of energy and ready to start with my professional journey in the field I always wanted to be a part of. I would feel very connected with all my other team members who would guide me where I needed support and push me where I needed to move ahead. However, I was afraid of losing my productivity at work since the day I joined back after recovering from Covid. I would discuss this with my counsellor that I am afraid of never getting the energy, mind and peace I had before. Nevertheless, this was achieved too, with time and support. The positive energy and the space to grow at FAT moved me back from a black hole that was engulfing me in a void. My mental health greatly suffered in the initial months but I feel coming back on track, slowly- and finding a way to walk.

The need for mental health has grown by leaps and bounds during the current scenario. Covid-19 with its long-lasting disruptions across all sectors has nudged organizations; directly affecting the productivity of all team members. This leads us to understand the importance of mental wellbeing professionally and personally more. FAT, being one of the many exceptions in the group of civil society organisations in India, mandates to mark mental well-being a priority for not only its employees but also, its program participants (Young Women Leadership Program and Girls in STEM Program). Some of the steps that FAT follows to build a team and community with good mental wellbeing, which also helped me to cope up with the situation are:-

Check-ins: In the virtual world of working, we have missed human connections the most. The tangibility of connecting with your teammate over meals, coffee breaks, meetings and field visits would build an interpersonal connection that helps in recognizing the person’s emotions. While we sit across different corners of the nation, we at FAT, always start our team meetings with a “check-in”. This “check-in” is telling one’s current feeling, emotion and thoughts to the team members in Clear-Simple-Words. This act of saying out loud the unsaid things makes us more empathetic towards our teammates and works wonders to solve organisational issues. I would say out my feelings, and it helped my team mates understand me better.

Counsellors: While many organisations endorse having counsellors, FAT considers having them as one of the three most important circles at FAT. (Others are Coaches and Young Champions). The counsellors in FAT are spread across 3 sections of our community. i.e., One for FAT’s employees, one for program participants of the Young Women Leadership Program (called Young Women Leaders) and program participants of Girls in STEM (adolescents’ girls). This is a very unique aspect of a civil society organisation where you are not only providing emotional and mental support to the employees but also to the people for whom you work. The therapy sessions I took at FAT were my first ones and it played a big role in my coping mechanism of grief and loss.

Wellbeing Circles: The wellbeing circles are weekend circles where our Wellbeing Champion meets all employees (Although, it is not mandatory for all) to do exercises that help us empathise with our feelings and recognize them. To give an example- one wellbeing circle involved writing letters to ourselves and telling what we need to tell with words on a paper. With so much going on around the world, the simple act of telling your feelings to yourself and compartmentalizing them well, solves half the problem most of the time. In one of the wellbeing circles, I shared the most recent image of my father which was edited by a designer who was a part of the covid grief support group at Facebook. Everyone was astonished to see how complete strange individuals are supporting each other through support circles on social media platforms.

Wellbeing Activities: Wellbeing activities in different phases have been a part of FAT’s programs. From Peer Support Action projects, where young women leaders support each other in peer groups to the Hello Didi program, one-of-a-kind projects where one “Badi Behen” (Young Women Leader) supports an adolescent girl “Choti Behen” (participant of Girls in STEM program). This builds collective solidarity and makes teams more powerful to work with.

Wellbeing sessions from #CoronaNahiKaruna: FAT’s campaign is in the second phase with a motto – spread compassion faster than corona. One of the key activities planned in the virtual sessions with young women leaders is “Wellbeing sessions- Khud Ke Saath Dusro ki Dekhbhal”. With the professional therapist Ms Vidhi, (counsellor for YWLP), the participants learnt anger management, self-healing, writing letters to themselves, understanding emotions and dance therapies.

“It is wrong to burst out our fits of anger on others. This affects our relationship directly and eventually; in the long run, we will be treated the way we treat them.” – Laxmi, one of the young woman leader, after the session on anger management, shared her learning.

Priya Kumari from Bihar shared “I have learned how important it is to say “NO” for our wellbeing”

The most recent inspiration came from a poem by Deepika, Wellbeing champion and an alumna of YWLP.

जब मैं रोती हूँ मुझे लगता हैं मैं हूँ

जब मैं गाती हूँ मुझे लगता हैं मैं हूँ

जब मैं घूमने जाती मुझे लगता हैं मैं हूँ

जब मैं गाना गाती हूँ और मेर आँखे जब मुस्कुराने लगती हैं मुझे लगता हैं मैं हूँ

जब मैं घूमने जाती मुझे मेरे चेहरे की चमक बताती हैं मुझे लगता हैं मैं हूँ

जब मैं किसी ऐसे इंसान को देखती हूँ जो मुझे आकर्षित करता हैं मुझे लगता हैं मैं हूँ

जब मैं अपने बाल सवारती हूँ उसमे जो सुंदरता दिखाई देती हैं, मुझे लगता हैं मैं हूँ

जब मैं रात को सोने जाती हूँ और मुझे सुकून दिखता हैं मुझे लगता हैं मैं हूँ

जब मैं इसी आँखों में गहराई को देख पाती हूँ मुझे लगता हैं मैं हूँ

जब मैं किसी की स्माइल देखकर खुद स्माइल करती करती हूँ मुझे मेरी आँखे की नमी बताती हैं मैं हूँ।

When you have a team, who inspires you to build that inner resilience every day with complete compassion and empathy, you become stronger each day.

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Written by Almas Naseem

Updates taken from Rupali Rani, Vineeta, Deepika

Quotes from Deepika, Priya Kumari and Laxmi.